Why We Sabotage Good Things (And How to Finally Stop)
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Ever noticed how the moment life starts feeling calm, something inside you whispers, “This won’t last… don’t get too comfortable”?
It’s strange how we prepare more for heartbreak than happiness as if peace is a limited-time offer and chaos is our default setting.
And yet, we wonder why good things feel temporary.
We’ve mistaken survival for normalcy
Many of us grew up learning to anticipate problems before joy.
We became experts at overthinking, double-checking, self-doubting — all healthy for survival, but not for living.
So when comfort walks in, we don’t know where to place it.
It feels… suspicious.
Peace shouldn’t feel like a trap, but sometimes it does.
We confuse self-worth with what we’ve survived
Some people measure their worth through productivity, some through relationships —
but many of us measure it through pain.
We say things like:
• “I’m okay, I’ve been through worse.”
• “If it’s difficult, it must mean I’m doing something right.”
• “If it’s easy, something’s wrong.”
We don’t choose this mindset — it chooses us over time.
Good things require something we aren’t taught: receiving
Nobody teaches us how to receive — compliments, love, help, care.
We learn how to give endlessly, but receiving makes us awkward.
Almost guilty.
To receive fully means we believe we deserve softness.
And believing that… is hard.
So we self-sabotage without realizing
Some of the ways we block our own happiness:
• We downplay praise
• We choose familiar chaos over unfamiliar peace
• We question motives instead of accepting kindness
• We push people away when they get too close
• We prepare for endings the moment something begins
It’s not that we don’t want happiness…
It’s that we don’t trust it.
But here’s the truth nobody tells us:
Good things aren’t fragile.
We are just unfamiliar with them.
Happiness doesn’t disappear when you stop chasing it —
sometimes it actually arrives when you stop running from it.
Here’s where the shift begins
You don’t have to force joy into your life.
You just need to stop rejecting it.
Start with the tiny things:
• Accept compliments without explaining them away
• Allow rest without guilt
• Let people love you without suspicion
• Celebrate wins without shrinking yourself
• Stop assuming the worst just because the best feels foreign
These small shifts change everything.
You deserve a life that doesn’t feel like a battlefield
And you’re allowed to stop fighting all the time.
Let things be good.
Let things stay good.
For once, let yourself breathe in the softness you’ve always offered others.
Because you’re not sabotaging good things —
you’re just learning to trust them.